Part Ninety-Three
Oromë and Tilion had taken Tsuki with them from the Wood to the Hitching Post. It felt reassuring to have some other form besides a rabbit, but Tsuki had to admit, it had not been physically uncomfortable being in the small body, only strange. He was after all, a being of spirit and flesh he inhabited or formed by will was only temporary and always a size a spirit could inhabit, which was any size.
Oromë himself instructed Tsuki in some mental exercises and in the accurate history of the gods and creation, which was somewhat alike to the history Tsuki had learned from Elves and Wizards, but quite different due to the point of view it was told in. While they were at Tsuki's lessons, Tilion made a thorough investigation of the exposed Hitching Post.
Tsuki thought his father and the higher being that was his companion had an interesting relationship. There were times when he would like to will himself to a distant place and not witness certain aspects of the relationship, but it remained interesting. Clearly Oromë could have gone alone to the Wood on his errand to Beryl rather than take Tilion with him, or even ask him to wait in the boat. And Tilion evidently had the ability to travel to the Hitching Post with speed unreachable by mortal beings, or even Elves and could have made the survey here, alone, while Oromë was still in the Wood with Beryl.
It would have saved time, Tsuki said. And, whether time was an issue with gods became moot; as Tilion made a point of saying they chose to remain together.
Tsuki had been with them some time, though he was not certain how long, for time did seem to flow rather differently when one was a spirit and could travel instantly, or nearly so, to distant parts. He had heard many stories from them as they spoke to pass the apparent time and he had rarely heard one of them mention doing something without the other, unless it was in the distant past before they had become companions.
Now, they chose to be together. When one had a task they needed to do, the other went with them, even if they were unseen. They seemed sometimes to speak to each other as lovers. They certainly used familiar terms of address. Other times, they seemed like two veterans who offered understanding and protection to each other and who happened to occasionally participate in spiritual union with each other that seemed very much like sex but very much unlike the way it was done by mortals.
The more Tsuki was with them, the more he wished to go to Dale. Tsuki would be content to go back to Dale in a body and to make love to him the completely mortal way.
Dale was in some distress again. Tsuki recognized the pain of his curse like sickness through the bond. He had felt great anger and hurt and then a calm, and now a combination of sickness, drunkenness and sadness. If Tsuki could, he would go to Dale and lay in his bed. He would not move very much or speak, but he would lay there and wish Dale to be comforted. Tsuki realized, he knew Dale was lying in a bed.
"You are not concentrating. You are dreaming of the Elf again, I am sure."
"Not dreaming exactly," Tilion said as he came from the well of the Hitching Post. He was in his grey hunting clothing again, which seemed now his usual attire when he intended to do actual work or travel. Tilion would wear something much more revealing when he was at rest or leisure, and it might be different revealing clothing each time. Tsuki had managed white Elven robes, though he had never worn such a thing in life.
"I did not mean to," Tsuki said. "He just seemed so close."
Tilion came and put a hand to Tsuki's forehead. It felt cool, but not cold, and pleasant, the way his Master's hands had felt when Tsuki was still content with that relationship. "You are bonded, but I still suspect he has something with him that holds you. I said before, it could be you put some part of yourself in a thing without entirely being aware of it. It might be something that was used for magic, but then it might simply be something you held often or made yourself or had a strong association with."
"I believe you, but I do not know what it could be. Does it make a difference? If Dale has it, I cannot take it from him without going to him."
Oromë laughed. "He would like to have to do that."
"If you were able to concentrate enough you could determine what it was and then we could act to have someone else remove it, or at the least, you would be aware and possibly able to resist the call when you wished to."
"Why would I resist?" Tsuki asked. He felt something like tired, but there was no bodily weariness such as he could describe it. "I feel it now, like something is pulling a little part of me off that way." He waved toward the northwest.
"Rest for now," Tilion said, but he frowned as he said it.
"No, just a moment," Oromë said. They seemed in Tsuki's presence always polite when they disagreed and Tilion deferred to Oromë in most things, even if he had spoken once to make his disagreement clear. "Tsuki, we know how you want to go to him, but the truth is, it is not only for your sake that we suggest it. If you truly meant to go now, you have the ability."
"I believe that it is true I have things to learn," Tsuki said, "I feel that if I stay and learn, when I do go back to Dale, I will be better able to be of use to him and to make him happy, rather than worried over my strange state."
"Yes," Tilion said slowly. There was something he did not say. Tsuki knew. He was not aware of the details, but he had picked up enough hints to understand that Tilion and Oromë strongly hoped that Tsuki would go back to Dale in a particular state and type of body, even if they were not actually able to force this choice on him.
"It is also for the Elf's sake," Oromë explained. "An Elf would use some metaphor about tending trees here, and as much as I like them, I am not an Elf. I will try to explain so you can understand. You are now a higher being than an Elf. You were born and went through trials and died and exist as one of a race of spirits and are doing quite well in realizing your powers and in understanding mysteries that were veiled from your eyes for many years. Dale is an Elf. Their nature is unlike Men or spirits or even half-mortals. An Elf does not die. They may leave their body, but that is as insignificant a thing as you shifting from one guise to another. In the Elf's case, there is no shifting either. They receive another body, just the same as the old one was intended to be. Always they have the same spirit and the same body. Leaving the body is not 'death' for an Elf, and there is no great transformation or ascension involved in it. But, this is not to say that Elves never change or grow. They do. They even age. Slowly, but they do."
"Beryl shows age."
"Yes. What I am saying is that Dale is an Elf and that he is also an Elf in particular who suffered many trials at a young age that have affected his very spirit. Elves can become wounded in spirit. They can even be corrupted to evil, though we do not like to see it happen or admit it."
"I know, about Dale."
"I have not finished. You should give your god patience."
Tsuki bowed his head.
"Dale as you last remember him is changed and grown form the Dale he was the day you met him. That is fact. You personally had a rather stabling influence on him, rather reassuring. It is natural for him to crave that presence. It is natural for you to want to comfort him. But, one who is more experienced can see that it is going to be healthier for Dale to grow a little without your constant tending."
"That was a little like a tree metaphor there, Lord."
"Yes. He was like a sapling endangered by a great frost that needed a great amount of care just to survive, and he was tended by Elves and by you also. And now, Dale is stronger and he needs to be one to give support and shade to others. He needs to fully bloom. Do you understand?"
"Are you saying that I cannot go back to Dale until he is 150-years-old or something like that?"
"No. Dale is one who gathered rings quickly. He could have willed himself from his body and he did bind himself to you. Those are abilities which commonly come to Elves of more advanced years, but Dale's body and spirit responded to his particular experience and environment and so these powers were realized at a young age. Still, I truly believe the Elf will benefit from some time apart from you. Any time you are apart will seem too long to you, and yet the time you will be apart will be no longer than you can bear. It is for Dale that you should resist. Allow him to call on you only if he has great need, and do not go to him bodily or in any guise. Eventually even we would advise a return in flesh, but we do not advise it now."
"I understand."
"Sleep now," Tilion whispered, "and dream."
Tsuki slept and could not resist the pull on him. He became aware of a place. There was grass and evergreens, such as he had seen in the north, but there was no snow. The air was warm, as if it was the end of summer. There was a dew catcher set on the ground above a shallow hole. Dale was sleeping in the grass.
It was a dream, and Elf's dream, and it flowed more orderly and clearly than that of a Man. It was real, like walking back through a memory, but realer still than that.
Dale's hand was moving. It petted the fur of an old brown rabbit. That was it. Old Rabbit had allowed Dale to call him. Tsuki understood that the spirit guide he had believed in was not in actuality the spirit of a Rabbit, but an aspect of his inner self projected onto the Rabbit. The fur and bones Tsuki had made into pouch and ceremonial tool must have been imbued with some part of his spirit.
In the dream the rabbit lived and it was summer. Tsuki recognized the place. They had camped in so many places, but he did recognize this one. It was the place they had killed Old Rabbit. Tsuki would have rested under a tree. He looked at the tree.
"Dale."
Dale's eyes opened and his head turned slightly. He was lying on his side and Tsuki could not see the full of his face. "Tsuki, why did you not come before now? I needed you." His voice was harsh, either due to sickness or over emotion. Tsuki thought it must be emotion.
Tsuki knelt beside Dale and lifted him into his arms. "Dale."
"Don't leave."
"Dale." Tsuki bowed to kiss Dale's lips. Dale's hands rose
to his face. He was warm. His fingers combed through Tsuki's hair.
"This is real," Dale whispered, lips barely moving.
"This is a dream, but our meeting here is real."
Dale shifted the fingers of his right hand to Tsuki's lips and then kissed his throat. It seemed real. Tsuki was there. His teeth nipped at Tsuki's ear. "I want you to come back, Tsuki. I want to see you when I wake. Please."
"Dale, I love you."
"Where are you? If you truly live, why have you not come to me?"
"Dale, I will tell you only what you need to know. I died."
"But you are here."
"I have changed. I am Tsuki, your Tsuki, and we are bound, but it is not time for me to return to you yet. I will, Dale. I will keep my promise. I will return to you real and in bodily form, when it is safe for both of us. Until then, I cannot come to you, except perhaps like this."
"Everything is falling apart. They killed Tashmetum. The Orcs know I am sick. I do not feel I am getting better. Duma is acting so strange and cruel. I am truly afraid for him. There are many visitors here to hold meetings to decide the fate of the Orcs. Fei is being such a good friend to me, but I do not wish him to carry such a burden. Beryl was terribly injured and no one has seen him. The Brown came to us, but he is The Grey, and he seems changed; I do not trust him now even as much as I trusted The Brown."
"I hear you," Tsuki said and stroked Dale's hair. "Dale, you are an Elf so you will remember what happens here in your dream and not forget, so listen now so you can remember. Keep Old Rabbit's bones safe and close to you. Keep all my old Wizard things safe until I return. You have trials before you. It will not be easy to help the Orcs find their future or to keep peace now we have protected so many lives from destruction, but you are not alone. I will not be able to come to you always. Understand, I have my own trials before I may return to you. If you leave me to them, I may come back to you sooner. But when you have true need, use the bones to call on me, and I will communicate with you again, as I am now. Keep all my things safe and do not let others use them."
"I hurt so much. It is hard to think what to do."
"I know." Tsuki kissed Dale's face. "Go fetch Nightmare from the Men's camp and keep him near your guesthouse. You will rest more easily if Nightmare is there. You trusted the horse to watch you when you slept before you knew me."
"Nightmare. I did not think."
"Do not worry about Fei or Beryl or Duma. I believe Fei will be well and is showing you strength he always had but did not have cause to show often. He will not regret your friendship. Trust that Beryl and Duma will have others to aid them. It is very important you rest. It was a powerful curse that struck you and I could not undo all it had done. If you believe you must make a fact or opinion known, perhaps you can find another way to do it besides leaving your bed and wasting strength. Stay in bed when you can. Drink plenty of fresh water. Ask to have good simple food brought to you in small portions. You have done a great service to all and no good person will refuse to bring you meals while you recover. Everything will be worked out. I believe in you, Dale. You will find a way to work things out, even though I am gone."
"I tried to be strong. I made a plan on how to act, but that was before the trouble…and the little one dead."
"I am sorry to hear of it. I truly am. Clear your mind of those problems others can solve and the solutions you need will come to you. You likely have more allies than you know."
"I will try what you say. I thought that we worked well together, Tsuki. I miss you. I want to talk to you, and eat strange game others suspect inedible, and…I love you. Just when I was able to truly say it, you went away."
"And did you miss my poetry?"
"Yes," Dale whispered.
"And my tongue?"
"Oh, burn me, yes!"
"And my body?"
"Yes, Tsuki."
"Would you love me if I did not look the same?"
Dale nodded. He put his hands either side of Tsuki's face and stared into his eyes. "I would love you if you were a ghost and came to molest me in my sleep, yes, I will love you." He sighed and smiled, "But it would be nice to have something pleasant to look at."
"I will do my best. Dale, when I come back, whatever I look like, you will know right away that it is me."
"It will be a proper body I can make love with?"
"Do you doubt me?"
"I would wager you come back hung li-" Dale was silenced by Tsuki's tongue in his mouth. It had seemed the most effective way to keep from hearing whatever lewd remark Dale was trying to make.
Tilion looked on Tsuki as he slept. His son seemed quite peaceful there. "How long do you suppose it takes?" he asked Oromë. "Shall I wake him?"
"With an Elf, it always takes as much time as you have."
Tilion smiled. "And how much time does Tsuki have?"
"Enough to satisfy that one, I think. Let him rest until he wakes
on his own. That Elf has suffered no fewer hardships than your son, and
yet he remains good and far less tainted in spirit than he himself believes.
They would have taken him into the Blessed Realm without question. He
chose to remain for Tsuki, but his remaining will benefit others. Dale
is a good Elf."
"He seems so. You told Tsuki that he had a positive influence on Dale, but I think this Elf also was good for Tsuki. It was no one's design that they should meet, that I know. Still, they seem to suit each other."
"Dale helped Tsuki overcome his attachment to the Wizard. It was important for Tsuki to overcome that, and to realize the flaw in that relationship. Together they did the world a great service. Let them dream a while longer. When Tsuki wakes, he will help us seek out the things the Sea left here."
When Dale woke, the water was boiling merrily in the kettle over the fire, and the fire itself crackled happily in the hearth and Dale felt quite gay. His body ached, but it was somehow bearable. He called out for Fei and the Eastman came to his bedside within moments.
"How do you feel now?" he asked Dale.
"Good, but there is still pain." Dale smiled. "I had a good dream."
Fei made a nod. "Do you need anything?"
"Yes. Fei, you are a good friend, and I do not wish to burden you, but if you are willing, there are some things you can do to help me. I will accept all the aid you will give. First, tell me how long I have slept and what news there is."
"Yes, we are friends," Fei agreed. "You slept through the day since we returned from the river. There was a meeting and Setsugekka and I went. You were summoned also, but I said that you must rest. The Grey visited. He wanted to give you medicine. I told him if you had need of his potions you would send for him. The Wizard did not seem pleased, but he left peacefully."
"The meeting…how did it go there?"
"Little was decided. Much time was taken in introducing all the parties and in explaining their titles and their interest in matters and in establishing who had authority to say what on behalf of whom. This took so much time that, after these introductions were made and the purpose of the meetings were explained, a recess was called until tomorrow. It is still night now."
"I will want to hear of the meeting and who these guests were, soon, if you will tell me, but first, I have some other tasks I need done."
"Yes. I will do what I can."
Dale made a slight nod. "First, I should like to contact the Grey and have him bring medicine, but only half as much as I took the last time. It is my intention to rest as much as possible and only to dull the pain enough to rest properly. Next, I should like a proper bath. Fei, please bring paper and ink. I will write notes that you may deliver so that you will not have to speak the message."
"Yes." Fei left Dale's bed and went to the table nearby. He retrieved some loose sheaves of paper, pen, ink and water. He brought the paper to Dale and then sat nearby mixing ink from the dry block and water into a small bowl.
"And Duma…?" Dale asked.
"Shortly after you fell asleep Gwindor came here with an Elf I do not know and took all of Ugarit and Duma's things, but did not take anything that had belonged to the little one. Gwindor spoke to me alone and said you would know his purpose and where Duma would be. And since Gwindor is our friend, I trusted this."
"Gwindor spoke the truth. I do not actually know the location he brought Duma, but I did request he escort Duma and Ugarit to a certain type of place. It is probably best I do not know the exact location. I will not bother them or be able to tell others how to find them. They should have what peace they can."
"I agree. They seemed both distraught at the River. I saw you spoke to Marduk there. Did you discuss anything of value to others? Lenaduiniel and I spoke today and she told me that she believes she saw Marduk weep when Ugarit sent the little one in the basket into the river, but Captain Anto was present also and he does not believe Lenaduiniel. He says she is mistaken, that Orcs are not capable of weeping and that some debris must have flown into his eye and made it water."
"Orcs can weep," Dale said, "I do not know if Marduk did. When we spoke it was about me. Marduk knows that I am ill. He asked if it was the sickness that other Orcs had, and if I was one who was sick and dying or sick and getting well. I told him that the Sea had struck me with a powerful spell as I stood against him and that it had caused sickness and injury and that with rest I would get well. Marduk-Chieftain said that he could not speak for other Orcs, but he would make no challenges against me when I was weak with injury. He said that if he did challenge me, it would be when I was strong, so that he might prove himself truly."
"Do you believe he will challenge you?"
"I honestly do not know."
"The ink is ready."
"Please help me with this pillow so I may sit." Dale sat up and allowed Fei to help him. The paper and ink were put on a board across his lap and Dale wrote several messages in Elven. One of these was to Lord Royalhill, but he knew that like Fei, Royalhill was a scholar, as well as being a Lord, and would be able to read the message as he had rendered it.
One message was to Gwindor, thanking him for helping Duma and Ugarit and also asking if he had time to escort Dale to the bathing pavilion, as he wished a proper bath, yet felt too ill to bathe alone. In the message he indicated that if Gwindor was for any reason unable, Dale wished that he would discreetly ask some other Elf they trusted to take his place.
The message to Royalhill asked that Dale's horse, Nightmare, which he described, be brought close to the guest house and if the Lord would be so kind, to send someone with water and fodder each day, so that Dale might have his horse nearby while he convalesced, yet be assured of its care. He also thanked the Lord for caring for the other horses, which belonged to Tsuki and Duma and Beryl and asked if there was anything he might offer that the Lord and his Lady had need of. Dale addressed the message to the Lord, though he knew the Lady was the one who saw to the horses, or commanded her guard to do so. Dale thought it seemed more proper to address the Man and not his wife, and though the Lady was noble, she was not ruler of a land herself, but kin to Lords of certain lands, and it seemed better to Dale to address the one who would have the say in the meetings, even if his wife would likely be able to influence him.
Dale composed also a message to the Grey, so that Fei would not have to ask for the medicine, but only pass the note that made Dale's request.
"Tell me please something of the meetings, before I finish with the ink, so I will know if I shall write any more messages."
Fei explained to Dale that when he and Setsugekka had been summoned and they had made it known they wished Dale of rest, they had taken two of the seeing stones Setsugekka had been keeping, because Lenaduiniel had sent work requesting they do so, but they had left the Star Stone among Dale's things.
"Before I forget, help me bring together all Tsuki's things which we are keeping and bundle them safely. This pouch here I will keep safe on my person, but all the rest should be bundled and hidden away."
"We can put the things under the floor until we leave here," Fei said. "The brown cloak was so soiled with blood that Setsugekka and I burned it one day while you slept, but all the things from the pockets are still here, and other things belonging to Tsuki, luggage, garments, gear for Moon-shadow, purses, and other equipment."
"We may possibly have use of Moon-shadow's equipage, but please bundle all the rest, but if there is a little gold in one of the purses, remove that. Tsuki would not deny me a loan. Leave all the other coin and jewels."
"Yes, a Ranger named Miller was there and Captain Anto also and they spoke to me to bring a message to you. I would have soon remembered if you had not reminded me now. They say there is some remainder of pay due to you from the Rangers and they asked if Tsuki had kin, for if he was dead, they should have the wages he earned and a small pension. I said that you were his kin and that Setsugekka was of his house and that he had supported her. Anto said that he had the funds to cover this debt to you, and if you would yourself vouch for Setsugekka or make a claim to Tsuki's wages yourself, Anto would give these funds to you."
"Then I must write also to Captain Anto. A Ranger Captain reads Elven. Tsuki is alive, but I will hold any remainder of his wages for him and see that Setsugekka is cared for. Is she here now?"
"Asleep in her bed."
"She and I know that we will stay together until Tsuki returns, but I will ask her when she wakes if she has needs. Perhaps she needs a gown or some other goods women have need of. She can likely buy what she needs from the Elves, or find an escort among the Men to the trading post."
"Dale, are you certain he is alive."
Dale looked at Fei levelly. "I saw him today."
"Here? Was Tsuki here?"
"No, not here, but I did see him. It was real. He is…it is hard to explain. He died, and yet, he lives."
"A ghost?" Fei whispered.
"No. Not a ghost, something else…but real. In this world. He did not say he was unable to come to me in flesh, he said he would not at this time, that must mean he is able. He is back, only, he has some business before he will join me again. That is what I understood."
"This is not something I understand, but I believe that there may be things Men cannot know and understand in the world. If Tsuki was alive, you would be one to know."
Dale nodded. He completed his message to Anto saying that Tsuki's death was not proven and Dale would make no claim to a pension on anyone's behalf, but that any wages Tsuki had earned prior to death would be considered a debt and Dale would collect this amount from the Rangers with any wages he had earned, for it was Tsuki's express wish that Dale keep all his things until he returned or his death was proven, and then, as they were wed by ancient Elven rite, Tsuki's things should come to Dale permanently, including Setsugekka who was of his house, and a pension should be paid to him as it would be to a ranger's widow, if all things were to be fair, even though he was able to earn his way, and he would use the monies to keep Setsugekka. Dale did not know if this would seem sensible to Captain Anto, and a few Rangers might have a laugh over it, but he left the letter as written.
"You said the seeing stones were asked for. Why did they need them?"
"The Grey took several away with him, including Setsugekka, and the stones. They were to determine who might have the strength of will to wield these stones to communicate with others who would be at the meeting but who were unable to travel here. The Grey had brought a atone with him called the Earth stone, taken from The Sky. We had given over the Moon stone and the Wind Stone. The Grey said that the other three were all accounted for and three who were distant would communicate through the stones to make the will of their people known, and the truth of the messages would be known because all who were present and wielded the stones would be able to hear the communication of the others and give witness to their words. He did mention that one stone remained with you."
"And was it decided who would wield the stones?"
"Galadhiel was to wield one, the amethyst Wind Stone, as an Elf-Lord among her folk to the west, near the sea held the one called the Sea Stone and would communicate the will of their people through her. The Lord Royalhill was found strong enough to hold another, the Moon Stone loaned to him by Setsugekka, and be the voice of the High King, who was his Lord, and also to Laurel, who is now with this king and holding the Sun Stone, and speak the will of Mannish kingdoms not represented in person. The Grey was to retain the Earth Stone and witness what the others communicated and also to speak for you, if you had words for the council, but we did not think it necessary to disturb your rest."
"When they meet again, I will lie here and listen and speak if I have something to add," Dale said. I have no more messages to write, but I have one other message for you to deliver that will not be written. I must find the Orc Jareth. If he lives still, I would speak with him, here. Many of the Orcs know you and will likely not challenge you. Go with your sword, but do not draw unless they do. Ask who has seen Jareth and if he has not found a way to die. Say that Dale-Chieftain wants to have words with him."
"I will speak to them and find this Jareth. I have heard from Elves that his whip was destroyed."
"Yes. Duma cut it with his knife. I learned of it while we were gathered at the river. Jareth is no longer a Chieftain and he is without Clan. This is why I will speak with him. I can use him if he can be made to take my commands."
Fei took the last note and blotted the ink. He folded each and wrote the name of the recipient in Elven letters, of which he knew enough. "I will see that your messages are delivered and return with any replies." Fei gathered up the letters, tucked them inside his jacket and then took up his sword from beside his own bed before leaving the house.
Dale had forgotten to ask for food, but depending on the replies, he
might find someone to make this request for him.